My Very First Client Eric Mallette – A Sweet Young Soul!

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I became a mortgage agent because of my university classmate Lihua. This is a profession that I would and could never imagine doing since I came from a country where mortgage has been only about 15 years of history since 1949.

I joined Multi-Prêts in the beginning of 2003. It was only till the end of the 2nd year when I got to know that the first half of each year is the busy season for our profession, which means that we should get ready and work hard to make 70% of our business. This is because most people who rent will have to notify their owners of their intention of not wanting to renew 3 months before the expiring date of their leases. I didn’t know that and I took my time in starting my work.

Time passed without trace when my easy-going attitude was tossed aside by my very first client in May.

It was 3 o’clock in the afternoon in our office at Berri & René-Levesque. I was trying to set up my computer and start fooling around in my new business of which I had absolutely no idea what it was and how to go about it.

We had a condo of 1,200 square feet as our office, ground floor with a semi basement. It was basically the place for our Call-Center with agents coming in to meet our clients. I should say it was a bit too small for a company of about 12 people working from 8:30am to 5pm and 200 agents in and out. Luckily we had the semi-basement where we had copy machines, etc.

I was making some copies when someone said to me: “Are you Hai Bo? Some one wants to speak to you.”

I asked back: ” Oh, Where?” Then I heard my name called through the loud speaker:

“Hai Bo, pick up line 2, a client called Eric wants to speak to you.”

Before I could really realize what the matter was, the phone was put in my hand and I heard a man’s voice:

” Bonjour! Je peux parler avec Mme Hai Bo?” (Good-day! Can I speak to Ms Hai Bo?)

“Ohooo, French! my god, French!!!I learned only 7 months during 4 years and now I have to speak French to a client!” I sweated this thought, but had to reply quickly in FRENCH!

“Oui, c’est moi, Hai Bo! Qu’est-ce-que je peux faire pour vous?”( Yes, it is me, Hai Bo! What can I do for you?) “of course, mortgage, what do you think, you idiot!” I cursed myself about the dumb and awkward reply.

The following 2 minutes, we were talking in French, couldn’t go on, we agreed to change to English, then couldn’t go on neither and the conversation got stale. Obviously, I was not at all prepared for such a conversation, the quality is assumably imaginable. Then I asked him:

“Do you have time later today so that I can talk to you, because I am busy right now and it is better that I talk to you later”. Of course I was lying, not for bad purpose, but truly to win more time to prepare in order to save my first deal!

“Pas de problèmes. Mais je vais travailler bientôt et demain je serai en congé!” (No problem. But I am going to work soon and I will be having a day off tomorrow!)

Woohoo! Okay, I said to myself: I can offer to go see him. I expressed my wish and he said yes. I was so happy that I will meet my first client. He was living in Vaudreuil-Dorion. I got his address and the appointment was set at 3:30 pm in the afternoon the next day.

I prepared myself what to say to him, got ready the contract and other necessary document, and off I went in my car. It was raining and the rain just got heavy on the way. I had never been to Vaudreuil-Dorion and had no clue it was this far. The pools of water on Highway 720 Ouest made my car sway from side to side, the wiper had to be crazy like the flopping wings of a flying hummingbird so that I could see 5 meters ahead. I slowed down but only to hear the driver behind horning!

“Okay, okay, go ahead! I’ll let you pass!”

Got over the bridge and I had to turn around a few times because I got confused of the roads as a new driver here. I arrived 25 minutes late than I expected( it took me 50 minutes, but it should take only 25 minutes).It was 20 to 4.

Arriving late, I was feeling sorry thinking, my god, first time seeing a client, and I was late! Damn!

I knocked on the door. A very young girl showed up.

“Bonjour! Je m’appelle Hai Bo, et je suis ici voir M. Eric!” (Good day! I am Hai Bo and I am here to see Mr.Eric). The girl led me into the house.

Oh, my! whom I was meeting was a very young man of 26 years old! One great thing about our profession is that we do not have to ask bluntly the age of our clients!!! It is a requirement! So, he was neither tall, nor short, not too small, definitely not big. A quebecois of the moyen look! His girlfriend stayed all the time very quietly by our side watching and listening.

I didn’t really know how I got the forms filled out, contract signed and how I left his parents’ house. One thing I did notice was that they were very quiet and didn’t say much. The whole procedure was in FRENCH. They answered all the questions I asked and agreed on anything I said. After all these years of working mostly with my own people with whom I had no problem of communication, I realized how nice they had been all this time during the interview, how patient and trustful they had been towards somebody they had chosen from the internet!

The institution that I applied had a rule that it only gave us agents one chance if the rate lowered down. Well, we never know how many times the rate will go down. The later the date of the transaction of the client’s deal, the more chance we will have to catch the lowest rate for our clients . Most banks allow us to follow the lowest point in the rate changes 10 days before the transaction date, but this institution gave only one chance. I was worried. Worried that I could not get the best rate for my first client…

The rate did get down twice. If I had locked the first one, I would have missed the second one and the third one. But I did lock the first one and I fought for the 2nd one very hard on the phone with the underwriter and I finally matched the best rate on the market for my very first client.

5 years passed and their renewal was about time. I called him up and asked him if he would use my service again. I felt very warm and grateful when I heard him reply:

“Bien sûr!”( of course!) again in French, “Je voudrais encourager le gens qui m’ont aidé!” (I would like to encourage people who had helped me!) So, I signed the contract with him again for the 2nd time, yet it was not as smooth as the 1st time. Usually, there is no notary or any other fee when we transfer the loan to another bank or institution, but the loan with his first institution was not transferable which means that there will be a notary fee to pay! Bang! I got stuck! I had promised Eric that there would be no fee whatsoever, now there would be a fee, not 200, 400, it was 900!

“What am I going to say to Eric?”, about this fee and my mistake! My commission was much less than this figure. Even though I would give it all up, that wouldn’t be enough to cover it! I tried to negotiate with the institution for half of the fee willing to pay the other half myself, but unfortunately, I got a soft sympathetic NO! I did feel very ashamed to talk to Eric about all this, yet I had no choice but to tell him the whole story and asked him of his opinion.

“Hai Bo, c’est pas grave! On va le payer. Le taux que vous m’avez donné n’est pas mal du tout!” (Hai Bo, it’s ok! We are going to pay for that. The rate you got for us is not bad at all) I understand that he had absolutely no reason to be so nice, but he did pay the notary fee himself. I had another case where I gave up all my commission to my client because for that time, the manager of the center promised me the notary fee, but nobody of his center would acknowledge his promise because he left for another institution, and I had no e-mail to prove his promise. I represented the bank. Whatever I promised the client is a true deal even though my bank falled me bad.

Of the 2 experiences that I had with Eric, I was learning something from him. Something that we could do, but we usually do not do out of many reasons such as rules, promise, loss, etc. You promised, so you should deliver as promised! I learn something that is beyond all these moral values and that can not be measured by any of these rules and logic. This something is called: kindness, generosity, forgiveness, support and respect! It has been because of these people that I grow and it is because of these great priceless qualities that I am successful today. Of all these years of my life, luckily I met with them all the time… I am lucky, grateful and I am ready to follow my sweet young soul!

Danger from Behind-Wonderful Experience Ever!

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After about 8 times of learning and practicing with a professional coach and some assistant coaches, I can ski quite at ease now. Of course, it will take 10 years to ski really very well…???

Accidents are normal in all the sports we do. In Ski, we fall down, on our butts, on the sides, on the face, on the back, and face up and head down the slope, all kinds of ways of falls, you can just go on and on…but one kind of accident we are seldom aware is not because of us, it is because of others who are behind! You have no idea and for sure no fear till you are seriously hurt or never feel nothing if you are dead because of the accident…

I am a no shit woman, falls? nah, no big deal, get up and continue! A few times, my falls were quite hilarious! First one was not really a fall, it was a volunteer sitting down because the steep slope really got on my nerves and I had to sit down on the slope to prevent the real one! Ayoyo, being a chicken a few times, yet that was a way to prevent accident and danger.

I keep telling my family and friends that it is great fun to ski, much more fun than to skate. There is speed, slope, situations that challenge us, and it doesn’t hurt even though we fall on the puffy gentle snow. It is really a perfect sport that a person could ever dream of…I had no idea it could be dangerous till I was body flat on the end of the slope with a big man on top of my back…

Obviously, I didn’t fall down myself! I just knew that I was on the snow long, 2, 4, maybe 6 minutes without the ability to move…my face was covered with snow, hair came out from the cap and mixed with snow;  tears were running down the right side of my face, steams from my gasping mouth were misting my face and  frozen up with the temperature…My skis were off my feet and poles were under my body… I had even no chance to say AOW, AOW…just hearing Yvette calling with her special swiss french:  “Ca va, toi? Hai Bo? Olala, Mmmm, Olala…” The man who dived onto me from behind with his ski board was trying to get me up, but I chose to stay longer on the snow trying to feel if my organs were still there and bones were still well assembled…

Yvette went down the slope and got the Ski Patrol up with a rescue sled. What were they going to do with me? Whatever would be a brand new experience for me who had never a bone broken, nor had anybody’s special  attention! There I go, me, a complete victim, a vulnerable strong woman now incapable of anything, was wondering how my life had gone in control of others and how I became so tame in front of these 2 red coated sexy Canadian Ski Patrolmen…That was a very good feeling when once a while becoming a needy, being taking care of and looked after in such a great details…a feeling that I before never had…

They put a neck brace to hold my head, even though it seemed not necessary! They stood up the sled against my back and bound it with my body. Then they held me down on the sled and covered me up with blankets and pads. Buckled up like that was funny and I felt like a mummy alive! I had my hands in gloves held up in front of my chest like a boxer, but unfortunately a boxer down and out with probably hidden bruises and broken bones! Before they started hauling me down the slope, they asked me all sorts of questions for medical reasons, including my age. Then the older gentleman said to me in French accented English and English accented French: ” we are going to slide you out down, ma cherre charmante jeune dame…”,  “and let me disappear in the woods…?” I replied with some hehe…knowing that he was joking.  We had fun…

The older man was in the front leading the sled and the younger at the rear making sure that the upper end of the sled didn’t slide down when breaking. My head was towards the downhill and that was hell of a feeling…but they went gently down. But the weirdo thing was to look at the beautiful sky head down with 45 degree body angle, hearing the slushy sound made by the sled, the younger man at the rear position sliding in and out of my limited view…That was a precious moment, a moment of purity, sincerity and simplicity, a moment of after-drama release, a moment when I felt like an injured swan floating on a lake lead by 2 princes who were going to espouse me in their dreamily wonderful palace…

I said there was nothing serious about the unknown injuries, but I was feeling pain in the chest and head when the sled passed over the bigger bumps..I cried AOW a few times…

Danger is a true one when we are not aware of it. Becoming less ignorant or becoming more knowledgeable is an important way to reduce danger in life. To learn to listen when skiing or doing anything else  which invloves danger such as driving is one very important skill in keeping safe. Of course, we sometimes get hurt by pure chance, for which we can only say hard luck! My wipe out was half because of bad luck and half of newbie skier. Nontheless, I got wonderful people around me, my boyfriend, his parents and the 2 great ski patrolmen who turned magically my bad luck and the behind-danger into a wonderful experience ever!

Birthday Gift to My Son!

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Dear Qiaofu:

01Today it is your birthday. It is not an ordinary birthday for you, nor a plain one for me neither.

Most of your birthdays, I could only hear your voice over the phone crossing ocean and lands, crossing 12,000 miles half way around the world and I could only wish you Happy Birthday, hoping that you could feel my love through these 4 pale Chinese words 生日快乐, hoping with a slight worry and doubt that you be alright without me everyday in your life…

02My heart is pumping hard and fast this moment I write, recalling all the days, months and years thinking about you, worrying about you and loving you without you beside. My tears start running down my face this moment I write, hearing your voice changing from a boy into someone who sounds like a duck, and then into a man, seeing you growing taller, smarter and you turning into a handsome young man…

My Life has been full of joy with you born into my world, even though I was totally unprepared. Upon hearing that you were inside me, I was scared the shit out and I even bit my tommy out of fear! I hope you didn’t feel my cruel hits yet instead, you become stronger and tougher!

15The green summer days under the beautiful Gingko trees on my campus watching you playing Dominos with the red bricks at 1-3 years old, winking each other’s eye lashes together on the sofa, picking out your ear shit now and then, falling back together on the bed when tired learning piano, bringing you to Decos watching you eat 2 hamburgers, one chicken breast with 10 small chicken balls drinking one big Coca Cola at age of 12-13, watching you danse (latin), with your arms dangling in the air not knowing where to put them properly…endless fun moments, endless joyful images and endless memories of you and me being together happily, no feeling of time, sorrow, or fear!

22My life has been added the ultimate precious value with you being my son! You your self, your life itself has been the most precious gift I ever had in my life! I am honored and proud to be your mother, a mother who was not sure how to be a mother, who has been learning how to be your mother while most time not being there and who has become a better person because of being your mother!

It snows big flakes outside and you are at school at this moment. Today, it is your unusual birthday, your birthday of getting into 20 years of age, in Montreal Canada, a birthday which symbolizes the start of your adulthood!

imgp1597You were born in the year of Dragon! How often we Chinese wish our kid be a dragon and how much heart, energy and money we spent in wishing our kid become a dragon! I bought the best gifts for you and remember all those expensive Legos!? Yet today I haven’t bought you anything! Instead of buying you the best gift, I want to let you know that I have been always trying to give you the best gift behind the gifts: the best mother, the mother who always love you no matter what, when and where, the mother whom I hope you love and look up through forever! That should be the best gift for you, and best parents are the best and indispensable gifts for all our children!

Much Love,

Mom, Jan.30th, 2009.

In Control of Fear – II – Investment

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To do investment is nothing different than to ski. I say that to invest in real estate in the long term is like to go ski. We have the immovables ( properties ) as the solid base that we can see and touch all the time, just like having  the earth under our feet when skiing. In ski, the better the professor’s coaching skills, the longer we ski step by step, the stronger we can control our fear, the better we get, day by day and year by year; in investment, the better our adviser’s opinions, the better foot we start on our business and with time, the better we get! Just for fun here that I think to invest in stock market is in all sense very similar to Sky Diving, which is very abstract, largely based on frequently changing  information and which requires a much more bold mind and explicit delicate precise techniques to be a winner. One thing very different though is that sky diving has one out of a million who fails, but investing in stock market without an adviser or with a bad one, will end up 100% failure!

Investment is new to us Chinese. Just by looking at our parents and our schools we know that we are green hands. We are all alone here to learn by ourselves. We do not have much legacy from our ancestors who valued Agriculture while despising commerce. In our concept, we still viewing money as part of our moral rather than just a machine to work with or many of us( not limited to  Chinese)still indulge in enjoying money as a main factor to satisfy our greed or release  unhappy feelings! In another word, many think that we are unhappy because of not having enough money! We know that money is not everything, especially in our modern world where basic living has become not a question, yet money is an important tool for playing interesting games to explore the unknown corners in our mind and challenge our fear!

My parents had no idea how to play with money. Of course they didn’t have much to play with the first place, but they have extra as retired teachers and they could do something. Instead, they put their money in their saving’s account, the nature of which is like standing on the ground, to be more precisely, on a downhill watching the train passing by. In another word, their money has always been dead while if invested, the money is alive. If the money is not Benjamin Button, then it is going to grow with time like us people growing up with time.

My parents’ not investing has their reason. The reason is fear. They think they have no experience in doing such things that they have zero knowledge in. I think they haven’t changed the traditional mentality about money and haven’t understood the nature of money which is that  money is alive and they are people who basically do not want to explore much in life because it is not necessary and they do not trust anyone.  All their life, they made their decisions about money out of emotions which is naturally and basically controlled by  fear!

I did my first investment in buying my first house and moved my parents there from their city. They lived in my house and their house in their city was locked up. My mom was complaining that they spent too much money traveling between the 2 cities ( 6 hours of train ) and they felt troublesome having to go back to read the meters and pay fees. They are people who would always feel afraid if they do not have some money in their pockets ( which is natural to absolutely most people, especially Chinese who never have much social financial support ). So I asked them to sell it, which was a very bad idea! Anyhow, it was a choice we made to avoid trouble, nothing wrong about that. But the problem appeared after we got off the moving train ( sold the house and got the money off the market ) and then forgot or were not conscience enough to get on another train to keep the money alive!!! Duh! But for some time, they felt rich and secure at least!

My brother wanted to buy a new car. He paid a big sum of deposit before knowing that he could not borrow money from the bank because of his unstable musician job! In order to save this deposit, my parents decided to lend him 50k which was scarcely paid back. 10k, so what? What is losing it so fearful? Losing this money is better than getting into this complicated parents and son relationship where they could not force him to pay because there was no contract for the loan and he was not having enough money all the time and it was the son’s problem the first place! Car is a movable, it depreciates very fast. In 5 years, a brand new car is worth almost nothing! Plus, it is a big consumer, gas, repairs, parking, annual fee and insurance, you name them! A car then is worth 5 years salary of a retired teacher!

My brother divorced! His wife wanted to leave and he was stupidly enough to give her their house, on which he put all his money! His wife is a doctor and he still is a Gipsy! I knew then that it was better for him to buy a place. So I “lent” him the down payment, and we bought him a condo. I lent him the money not as a banker and I knew he couldn’t before doing it.  I was not upset that he couldn’t pay me back, but I did get really upset when my parents again decided to put another 50k to reduce the monthly payment to avoid paying too much interest! Now, my parents have almost no money! What will happen if my parents are sick and need a big hospital deposit? Even though they have medical care, they need an emergency fund!! They have no family there, their former employers are 6 hours of train away, plus both their children are not with them!! This was an painfully bad decision again! To be afraid of paying more interest in later days caused their security fund right now and forever, not mentioning the potential financial impact on their daughter who now has to take into consideration of the possible consequences of this action!??? How smart was that? I just wonder how strong is this fear which controls people’s mind in making decisions even though there was a person ( me ) who definitely was against it and how stupid it could be to love saving for ourselves in petty minor ridiculous ways as such!!!

So, wake up, people! Wake up, us Chinese! Be true smart and be generous! Money lost is money gained somewhere else! Look away from the small places where we lose small money, look at the big place where we will gain much more!  Think with your head, control your fear in our heart and learn the techniques! Eventually, be generous and detached about the results! We can not have all in our life and it is impossible and vicious to gain all in our life! Look further and think further! Find good knowledge and information resources, trust, be serious and respectful!  Think true smart for ourselves and think true smart for our communities! We survive better when we think better and act better!